Flushed

The one pleasant side effect of my insomnia is that when I do sleep, I have extremely vivid dreams. Some of these dreams may be deeply unsettling, but at least they're compelling.

This morning, after I'd finally fallen asleep, I had one of my recurring dreams: trying to find a clean bathroom and finding only filthy, dank, stall-less bathrooms strewn with toilet paper, excrement and feminine hygiene products. Often, the toilets also are overflowing. In all the years I've been having this dream, which I started having in my early teens, not once have I succeeded in finding an acceptable restroom. Not once!

I've wondered, naturally, why the hell I keep dreaming about this. What does it mean? Does it relate to health worries? My inadequacies as a homemaker? The men I've dated?

Today I Googled "dream about bathrooms" and found a few ideas.

From Dream Moods Dictionary:

To dream that you are in the bathroom, relates to your instinctual urges. You may be experiencing some burdens/feelings and need to "relieve yourself". Alternatively, it may symbolize purification and self-renewal. You need to cleanse yourself, both emotionally and psychologically.

To dream that you are in a public restroom with no stalls, signifies your frustrations about getting enough privacy. It may also indicate that you are having difficulties letting go of old emotions. If you reveal these feelings, you are afraid that others around you will judge and criticize you.

To dream that you can not find the bathroom, signifies that you are have difficulties in releasing and expressing your emotions.

Yep, all of that makes sense to an extent.

From Experience.com:

For a young woman to dream of a bathroom, foretells that her inclinations trend too much toward light pleasures and frivolities.

Possibly.

Though this one is A) written for teens and B) rather absurd, it contains a shred of potentially valuable insight:

"Bathrooms in dreams often are linked to feelings of vulnerability, because we don’t want anyone to come in and bother us when we’re going. Also, when we use a bathroom, we expect that we’re going to have some private time."

Vulnerability? Sure, I'll buy that. You try moving to a giant city where you know no one and can barely pay rent. You'd probably feel vulnerable at least once.

The ideas on this site resonate with me most, and they echo what the first site says about self-expression and the changing of ideas or behaviors.

But still, I'm not convinced one way or the other. You guys did such a great job dissecting the freaky Santa dream -- care to take a stab at this one?