Hey Mister DJ!

Dear Shirtless Dude Across the Way,

I'm not sure if you realized this, but I can see you and your tawny flesh through my kitchen window. While I certainly do admire your evident commitment to physical fitness, I do not admire the fresh tunes you're spinning, for they are inexusably loud and are not, in fact, very fresh. I'm not sure how you expect me to concentrate on my work when you are over there being all half-naked and noisy. Please put on a shirt and turn down the volume.

Sincerely,
Rock and Roll Grammarian

P.S. -- Might I also suggest investing in a sturdy belt? I find your underwear both distracting and unappealing. Thank you.