Cultivation

Well, guys, it's been one week and one day since I began my adventure in plant transplantation. I promised to keep you updated, and because I'm a woman of my word (and because I know you've been waiting with bated breath lo these eight days), here's the scoop:

They're dying. Well, one is doing OK, but the others are galloping toward that big greenhouse in the sky. I'm bereft, bereft I say. A few days ago I asked a nice man at Home Depot whether he knew what had gone awry. He said a lot of things, most of which were delivered in such broken English I had to guess what he meant. Something about the plants "never really forgiving me" for moving them to a new pot and "suffocating in the new potting soil." He also used the word "berm" no fewer than five times.

What the hell? I thought the point of transplanting was to give their little roots a nice new place to call home. He suggested I start from scratch and gave me some detailed instructions on what depth to make the new soil. I dutifully followed his suggestions, and still the leaves are limp and blackening at the edges. Eli, I fear you've led me astray.

So today I decided to seek a second opinion from my biology lab instructor, who happens to know a lot about these things. He suggested I give the devil's ivy more water. So, that's what I will do. I do so hope this thing takes root and flourishes.